Monday, December 26, 2005

He didn't come for me.

My owner didn't come. I am still frozen. In a tiny freezer. With green beans.

Can you imagine how it would feel to be warm and soft and juicy and covered with gravy? Oh, I can. I can't believe he didn't make me for Christmas dinner. He is not even here. I am alone.

Friday, December 23, 2005

Uneasy

Well, the pizza got eaten day before yesterday, so that's good. But there's been absolutely no activity since then. Did my owner go out of town? Without me? Who's going to eat me then??

I tried asking the green beans, but they don't know anything.

Tuesday, December 20, 2005

Life in the freezer

Okay, it turns out that frozen green beans aren't as good company as you might expect. And the freezer is really a lot smaller than I'm used to and a little cramped. Today my owner actually put a frozen pizza on top of me! Outrageous.

But it's all right. Before you know it I'll be roasting in that wonderful oven, then drizzled with gravy, cozying up to mashed potatoes and stuffing and cranberry sauce. The green beans can go on the other side of the plate.

Wednesday, December 14, 2005

I'm going to be eaten!

These are exciting times, for a turkey. About 200 of my freezermates and I have just been purchased and distributed to employees as a Christmas gift - I hope it is no violation of modesty to say quite a handsome one, too. I'm in the freezer at my new owner's apartment. It's unbelievably tiny, compared to the place where I've passed my existence to date; but on the other hand, it's nice to have a place all to yourself. Well, except for the green beans.

Perhaps the green beans will be eaten as a side dish when I am served! Maybe I should try to make friends. I can't wait for Christmas dinner!