I'm lonely.

Today I'm feeling really lonely. There's nobody else like me here. I feel forgotten and abandoned. I am the turkey that nobody wants.

Why doesn't anybody want me?

My heart would break, but all I have is giblets.

Exciting day

Today I was not eaten. Hello? Is anybody even out there?

We did have a bit of drama in the freezer, though. Some frozen blueberries spilled out and left purple stains in the ice bucket and you would not believe how upset that made the squash, which didn't matter because the squash got eaten about 10 pm. And what does that tell you?

Anyway, the squash said to the blueberries, "Watch where you're going! You're making a mess!" and the blueberries said, "Up yours, squash, we're going to get munched down on and you're going to be sitting around in here forever!" and the squash was pretty pissed about that, but then you should have seen the expression on the blueberries' faces when the squash got eaten! Oooh! Burn! Freezer burn!!

What - you were expecting sophisticated humor from a frozen turkey?

Not Labor Day

Well, guess I'd better not be buying any white shoes.

Maybe Thanksgiving is it. Maybe so, who knows? But if not, it's okay. I am here to serve a purpose and it doesn't matter when that purpose is served. My faith has been cemented by these last few months in the freezer. I have this wonderful sense of serenity.